Podcasts and Articles
I love great conversations! Below, find some of my favorites with some of my favorite Christian writers, ministers and mindset coaches. We get pretty "real" in these chats, which leads to some real gems, including but not limited to this friendship advice: "Let your guard down, but don't take your pants off." Enjoy a few of my favorite articles and guest blogs below as well.
Take These Ashes with Heather Lobe Johnson
Processing Grief and Hard Emotions
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The New Testament calls God "the God of all comfort," and mourning is often the path to comfort. Heather and I talk about the need to look our hard emotions in the face instead of "lily padding": addressing behaviors/symptoms of spiritual issues on the surface, rather than getting to their root causes. This is was a highly personal and healing conversation, which we hope will give other women courage to befriend their feelings. Click to listen.
Called Into Being
with Jen Schultz
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Faith Writer Jen Schultz and I talk about calling people pleasing and codependency what they are and aren't, our core need that prompts us to please others, and how people pleasing gets us off our game and purpose. Listen for silly people pleasing examples, questions to ask when you're lost in insecurity, and a maybe-controversial view of our identity to God. Click to listen.
People Pleasing and Boundaries
Uncharted with Ines Franklin and Andy Lara
Walking in Exile
Ultimately this conversation is trying to bridge the gap between Christians on both sides of the political aisle by discerning between political beliefs (what is the function of government) and Christian beliefs (how are we to live like Jesus) -- and recognizing that the issues on both the Left and the Right matter to Christ. Click to listen.
Not My Story with
Sarah Westfall
Finding Ministry Through Failure
Sarah and I discuss how a painful friendship failure was the doorway to the greatest season of spiritual growth in my life. This was also the soil from which my book on friendship eventually grew. We talk about emotional safety, vulnerability and the difference between being authentic and being foolishly unguarded. Click to listen.
Minimalish with Desirae Endress
Simple Steps to Finding Friendship in the Season of Motherhood
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How does embracing minimalism relate to friendship? Both are about consciously editing what we collect -- whether it be tasks, possessions or relationships. The delightful Desirae and I talk about simplifying the process of making friends as a mother of young children, and why the choices we make in friendship are so critical to our well-being as moms. Click to listen.
Cultivating Authentic Friendships
The Christian Mindset Coach
Christian mindset coach Alicia Michelle and I talk about what keeps women from being real in their friendships, and how to be God-honoring in the way we share our feelings with each other. If you want to get to know the major themes of my book, All My Friends Have Issues, this is a great summary. Click to listen.
Journey of a Fearless Female with Paola Rosser
Breaking the Chains of Co-dependency
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​The most comprehensive interview I've ever given on co-dependency! What is it, what causes it, why don't we recognize it, and how can it destroy our lives and relationships? Paola and her co-host ask some great questions and we swap war stories about people pleasing and exiting toxic situations. You may find yourself wanting to examine some of the ways you seek comfort through people pleasing, or neglect your own needs in order to help and rescue others. Click to listen.
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....I’m also noticing that in both our critical-thinking conversations and my inner dialogue, there’s always a nebulous “they” who we assume has just not thought things through. “They” exist in the home owner’s association, the coffee house we frequent, the grocery store, the Senate, even the church. But I realize, having been in a number of those leadership positions myself, that leaders spend a lot of time problem solving.
So, I’d like to speak to the manager about myself. Click here to read the full article.
I'd Like to Speak to the Manager About Myself
I'm So Sensitive
Most of us are initially defensive when we learn we have hurt someone. But I have begun to gauge the health of a friendship by how fast we are able to push past the situation, and own our stuff, in the context of conflict.
As my girlfriends and I get healthier and come to trust each other more, the “I’m sorry's” happen more quickly. Click here to read the full article.
Two Years Sober: A Lesson in Strength
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A buzz does not take the place of a boundary. The first two weeks that I was totally sober, I noticed that my children have bad table manners. Without the slight blurring of the edges that a nice glass of wine does to the nervous system, I didn’t notice or care so much that my kids were eating salad with their fingers instead of their forks. Sober, I realized I had power over this problem: I could train my kids to eat like humans.
This was the first instance in which I realized that I used alcohol to tolerate unpleasant or unhealthy things that were happening in my presence. Click here to read the full blog.
Labels
Irony of ironies, codependency hasn't been added to my roster of "issues." Instead diagnosis and the process of 12-step helped me drop "anxious and depressed" off the roster. It was the healing I didn't know I needed.
So now, I take the label proudly: I'm Amanda, and I'm a codependent in recovery. And I experience daily one of the promises of the program that we read in every meeting: I feel genuinely lovable, loving and loved. Click here to read the full blog
